With all due respect to the "Drink of the Future," I think I've found two "Cocktails of the Here and Now" that top even it's gut-wrenching "marshmallow matrix." Check out the recipes for these two hangover intensifiers, compliments of the Cocktails Calendar, which I picked up for half-price at Powell's a few weeks ago:

Bullshot: vodka, beef bullion, Tabasco sauce, salt, and pepper over ice.

Michelada: beer, lemon, Worcestershire sauce, soy sauce, Tabasco sauce, salt, and pepper over ice.

Speaking as someone who still gags when my lips touch a Bloody Mary, all I can say is BLEEEEEECH! These are "Drinks of the Puke-ture."

Oh, so you think my tastes simply aren't refined? To that I say, PFFFFFFT! Tomato juice and celery? That ain't a drink, it's gazpacho and no one eats gazpacho. You know why? Because gazpacho flippin' sucks.

As you can tell, it isn't Nice Week around these parts. In fact, I think I'm going to declare the rest of this week BLEEEEECH! Week. Click back here for another disgusting drink recipe tomorrow folks!