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Another Portland Blog

Thursday, February 02, 2006

 

Knew something was up

It's been one of those days.

Ever since I opened my baby greens this morning, I knew something was up. Everything today has seemed a little...off. It's been the sort of Thursday where you know something dumb and weird is going to happen- the sort of day where the president goes on television, live, to say he was serious about working towards kicking the nation's gas addiction and/or announces he has Hepatitis C. And that he somehow caught it from a golf club.

The sort of day where you walk outside and discover your neighbor drove his car through a wall the night before and it's now parked in his living room. Or a gang of feral cats engaged in a turf war in the middle of your yard.

The sort of day where you simply can't wake up, wander around in a daze most of the morning despite the two cans of Red Bull you've consumed, only to later realize you're coming down with yet another $!#$!@! cold.

The sort of day where you're driving to work and a guy in an ancient suburban blocks traffic on an overpass in order to run across the street and retrieve a rusty muffler*.

The sort of day where someone has left one of the TVs in the office (which is filled with conservative, middle-aged women) on Showtime and t's airing a documentary about the history of feminism and also, apparently, breast feeding. The doc contains plenty of nudity but no one seems to care enough to get up and change it back to the Regis and Kelly**.

The sort of day where Jodie Sweetin goes Good Morning America to announce she's a recovering meth head. Yes, Stephanie Tanner, the hottest of the former Full House daughters (Candace Cameron and the Olsen twins? Bleeeeck!). Check out this passage, from an E! Online article:


After a particularly bad three-day bender, which reportedly resulted in an intervention staged by her former Full House costars, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, John Stamos and Bob Saget, Sweetin checked herself into Promises rehab facility for six weeks of intensive therapy.

Clean and sober since March of last year, Sweetin now admits she was "living a total double life."

"I was married to a police officer--we are going through a divorce right now--he had no idea," she said.


If anyone from that show was going to go public with meth addiction, I would have bet on the twins or Saget. Did you see him on Late Night last week? That guy's friggin' nuts.

* This actually happened. In Beaverton, of course. As for the neighbors car or cat gangs, this hasn't happened yet but the day is still young.


** This also happened.

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